Think Cheshire Cat!!!

Cause that is me right now, smiles from ear to ear. I just got off the phone to my brother-in-law Andrew who is the proud dad of another little princess.

Jo was only in labour a few hours and plop…a little sister for Princess Emily.  Unfortunately, unlike Emily’s birth, I was unable to be with Jo for the latest addition to our clan. And can I just say not a bad effort for my grandfathers, both of whom came here in extreme poverty from Britain and Ireland (my grandmothers were natives), as from them we have two clans nearing 200 members of descent and (call me biased) awesome citizens.

I wish I was there to be witness to such a phenomenon, something that is so intensely precious and only those close to the birth can really feel. We have all been in the situation, so I hope you can grant me a little self indulgence and feel the love I have for my new niece.

We’re just waiting to see what her name is, which will probably be just in time for the sweetheart to enrol in school…we hope…but isn’t that always the issue, what to name number two?

When it came to me, number eleven for my parents, it was pretty easy. David was from Davies (my grandmother’s surname) and my father’s middle name, and George was the name of my two closest uncles and grandfather…and, well, my parents had used all the trendy names of the 60s and 70s…after naming ten there weren’t many left!

If only it was that easy for Jo and Andrew. Well for now she will be just our little Princess.

I fell off my chair this morning upon hearing about some news from the Pacific nation of Tuvalu.

You see, since I was a boy, I have announced all great ideas that I have heard of or weird things I am doing originated in Tuvalu, to avoid explanation of my odd behaviour.. eg. ‘everyone is doing it in Tuvalu’.  Due to the fact that so many people don’t want to sound ignorant as to where or what Tuvalu is, I am able to have a response of ‘oh, ok then’… after all, what I was doing usually catches on.

Well wouldn’t you giggle when you hear this:

The people of Tuvalu have voted in favour of maintaining a constitutional monarchy under Queen Elizabeth II. According to a broadcast on Radio Australia on 17 June 2007, the referendum, held at the end of April, asked voters whether they wished to have a president as head of state.

Relying on a report in the Pacific News Service, Radio Australia said the results were in favour of the constitutional monarchy, with 1,260 people voting in favour, while 679 were against the proposal.

However, voter turn out was low, with around 2,000 people taking part of the 9,000 eligible to vote on the island, an indication that people were little interested in a republic.

Does that sound familiar?

Tuvalu was once part of the Gilbert and Ellice Islands, a British protectorate from 1892 and a colony in 1916.

In 1976, the islands were divided into two different colonies which became independent nations soon after.

The Ellice Islands were renamed Tuvalu in 1978, and the Micronesian Gilbert Islands were formed, with some other islands, into the nation of Kiribati in 1979.

The people of Tuvalu are mainly Polynesian. The country is a constitutional monarchy, a realm within the Commonwealth.

The referendum confirmed Her Majesty as Queen of Tuvalu.

Well, if all fashion really does start in Tuvalu, I’m a happy camper….and soon to be right in amongst the fashion of being a modern monarchist.

My last blog was a rehashed joke sent to me, which I published, and it caused a bit of a stir, to say the least. In fact I was bailed up about it (as I often am) at the Farmers Markets today. It’s fantastic to get feedback on my blogging, and to make things a little clearer I do need to set a few things straight, namely why I posted a satire on government which turns out to be different once elected to what you voted for.

As a well known member of the Nationals, people often think I am exactly what they perceive the Nationals to be…

I am not… I am my own man… and I have had very little to do with the Nationals for over two years now as my personal needs of community engagement and betterment are being met by my many other projects. By the way, I do not judge people who do not express a need to be active in community engagement and betterment. It’s a tough gig. People will always be keen to pull you down, which is a natural reaction to you standing up.

Luckily for me, most of the community engagement and betterment I have been involved with is not conducted in the policy changing environment and therefore not open to attack and criticism.

Back to the issue.

I am not a Liberal or a Labor supporter, I have a disdain for the elements of these two parties that take rights away from the common Australian.

I identified as a National because they seemed to be the party that had the best alignment to the belief I have that the vulnerable are cared for and the achievers rewarded without a bias to either… as well as an organisation I could give my time to to make a difference for my country.

However, the last blog was published at my disgust at the Labor Party of late.

Labor=Socialist Right???????

Wrong!!!!

Take these two examples:

The destruction of the single desk wheat marketing board. No, not the company trusted to handle the function, that being the corrupt AWB Ltd, but the actual mechanism itself.

The single desk was an export mechanism, which meant that ALL bulk wheat from Australia was sold by ONE marketer. The result is obvious (and for the world it was profound), that is that One Major Seller and many buyers meant better and more stable prices, as opposed to 100,000 wheat farmers selling to many massive world buyers, which would be lower and highly volatile prices.

It was socialism at work for the betterment of Australia’s wheat farmers, who produce the  staple food of our economy and society… bread.

Only weeks ago, Labor and the Liberal party took this away. Now the farmers of Australia have lost their psuedo-union, which enabled some stability on the crazy world food markets. It went without much notice and will go down in history as the saddest day in food production in our country, just as it was the greatest when it came into being a half century ago… you probably didn’t even know it happened. It is, in effect, the same as if the government banned the ACTU… imagine that going unnoticed.

Then you have Kevin Rudd and John Brumby doling out $70 million of YOUR taxes to a foreign multi-national car builder to fund a car that will use more fuel than cars already on the market today,  from a fund that was put aside for ‘research and development’. A car that is already being produced is hardly being researched or developed!!!!

Where is the socialism in that!!! Millions from working families to one of the world’s biggest corporations!!!!

Whilst farmers of this country have the key to our reliance on OIL and its controllers, OPEC. It’s called bio-diesel and is produced easily and cheaply on farms already from common broadacre crops.

So if Kevin was serious about socialism he would not be taking away our Australian single desk protection against multi-nationals or handing out millions to multi-nationals whilst globetrotting in Whale Yum Cha Central. He would be in Australia with his own people, using what we ALREADY have to protect us from these thugs in pinstripe suits.

While on his morning walk, Prime Minister Kevin Rudd falls over, has a heart attack and dies because the accident and emergency dept at his nearest hospital is too understaffed to treat him in time. So his soul arrives in Heaven and he is met by Saint Peter at the Pearly Gates. ‘Welcome to Heaven,’ says Saint Peter, ‘Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a Socialist around these parts, so we’re not sure what to do with you.’

‘No problem, just let me in; I’m a good Christian; I’m a believer,’ says the PM.

‘I’d like to just let you in, but I have orders from God. He says that since the implementation of his new HEAVEN CHOICES policy, you have to spend one day in Hell and one day in Heaven. Then you must choose where you’ll live for eternity.’

‘But I’ve already made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven,’ replies Rudd

‘I’m sorry .. But we have our rules,’ Peter interjects. And, with that, St. Peter escorts him to a lift and he goes down, down, down …all the way to Hell.

The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a lush golf course.

The sun is shining in a cloudless sky. The temperature is a perfect 22C degrees. In the distance is a beautiful club-house. Standing in front of it is Gough Whitlam and thousands of other Socialist luminaries who had helped him out over the years — Bob Hawke, Paul Keating, etc. The whole of the Labour Party leaders were there ..

Everyone laughing, happy, and casually but expensively dressed. They run to greet him, to hug him and to reminisce about the good times they had getting rich at the expense of ’suckers and peasants.’

They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar. The Devil himself comes up to Rudd with a frosty drink, ‘Have a tequila and relax, Kev!’

‘Uh, I can’t drink anymore; I took a pledge,’ says Rudd, dejectedly.

‘This is Hell, son. You can drink and eat all you want and not worry and it just gets better from there!’

Rudd takes the drink and finds himself liking the Devil, who he thinks is a really very friendly bloke who tells funny jokes like himself and pulls hilarious nasty pranks, kind of like the ones the Labour Party pulled with their master strokes on Education, Immigration, Petrol prices, Tough on Crime promises.

They are having such a great time that, before he realises it, it’s time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves as Rudd steps on the lift and heads upward.

When the lift door reopens, he is in Heaven again and Saint Peter is waiting for him. ‘Now it’s time to visit Heaven,’ the old man says, opening the gate.

So for 24 hours Rudd is made to hang out with a bunch of honest, good-natured people who enjoy each other’s company, talk about things other than money and treat each other decently. Not a nasty prank or short-arse joke among them. No fancy country clubs here and, while the food tastes great, it’s not caviar or lobster. And these people are all poor. He doesn’t see anybody he knows and he isn’t even treated like someone special!

‘Whoa,’ he says uncomfortably to himself. ‘Gough Whitlam never prepared me for this!’

The day done, Saint Peter returns and says, ‘Well, you’ve spent a day in Hell and a day in Heaven. Now choose where you want to live for Eternity.’

With the ‘Deal or No Deal’ theme playing softly in the background, Rudd reflects for a minute … Then answers: ‘Well, I would never have thought I’d say this — I mean, Heaven has been delightful and all –  but I really think I belong in Hell with my friends.’

So Saint Peter escorts him to the lift and he goes down, down, down, all the way to Hell.

The doors of the lift open and he is in the middle of a barren scorched earth covered with garbage and toxic industrial wasteland, looking a bit like the eroded, rabbit and fox affected Australian outback, but worse and more desolate.

He is horrified to see all of his friends, dressed in rags and chained together, picking up the roadside rubbish and putting it into black plastic bags. They are groaning and moaning in pain, faces and hands black with grime.

The Devil comes over to Rudd and puts an arm around his shoulder.’ I don’t understand,’ stammers a shocked Rudd, ‘Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a club-house and we ate lobster and caviar and drank tequila. We lazed around and had a great time.. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and everybody looks miserable!’

The Devil looks at him, smiles slyly and purrs, ‘Yesterday we were campaigning; today you voted for us!

Here is a massive Happy Queensland Day to everyone!!!!

It is an even happier Queensland Day, with our Country now having Queenslanders in the jobs of Govenor General, Prime Minister, Federal Treasurer…

I was pretty fortunate last week to spend a few days in Mackay and the Whitsundays with my eldest sister and a few mates. It seemed I hadn’t seen Sharyn since my Big Brother eviction or visited her in the years she has been living in North Queensland, which really made me stop and think….where has the time gone.

Putting guilt aside, we had a great catch up on all things, love, friends, work etc…and she showed me an abridged version of life up there, which was awesome, as was meeting a few of her friends.

Soon Sharyn moves back south to the family farm and I am hoping she will take on not just the looking after of my sheep during my absences but also develop the White Dorper stud which I have been hoping to do for such a long time but have been unable due to the prolonged drought and my need to be everywhere at once… You see stud breeding takes a hell of a lot of care and attention, which for the past two years I have been spreading too thinly. By the way, if you don’t know what the difference a stud is to what I do now….it’s kinda like having a general population and having just supermodels breed with each other.

After being shot through to Shute Harbour, Sharyn dropped me off to the ferry to head across to Hamilton Island, where I was to meet up with mates Brian, Shannon and Paulini (for the record, yes it is the Idol famous one…and her name is pronounced ‘POWlini’), who were on the island as part of the Century 21 conference.

Brian organised an insane day where we jet-boated and paraglided around the Whitsundays. We had a ball, to say the least, and thanks to Brian’s work with the resort, it didn’t cost a cent…which always helps when you are just staying above water.

Paragliding is something I have always wanted to do, and it could not have been more better… Effortlessly gliding through the air is one of the best things I have ever experienced, as was the next day snorkeling and fish feeding at Whitehaven Beach…which was on my 1000 things to do before I die list.

Stacking so much in only a day and a half, we just made our flight out, which although the airport is on an island smaller than my house paddock, we almost missed…which is in form for me… However, I have found that Paulini (that’s POWlini) is actually as bad, if not worse, than me at missing flights and losing phones, which is so good to know that I am not alone in the ‘are you serious, how can you?’ group of people.

Arriving back in southern Queensland saw a few days of getting on top of the office work and attending the Brisbane Queer Film Festival opening… which I must say did have a few good shorts but some very off-putting and horrendous ones. However, I have it on good authority that the actual films are brilliant…so am a little upset I won’t get to see them.

So the last few days have seen me running between Brisbane and the Gold Coast tying up contracts and meeting customers as well as last minute packing up of my office, which is very sad. It has been an amazing six months setting up the offices and processing facility on the Gold Coast for Farmer Dave Free Range Lamb, but the business has reached a point where the team is well and truly on top of it.. with a fantastic head butcher in Stu, an operations manager who never seems not to be at work in Peter, our online genius in Tim, and a new accounts lady.. the lovely and super able Nicole, as well as the marketeers.

I was supposed to spend the week on the property, getting everything ready for my sister to be able to take it on, as well as add some finishing touches to the new sheep yards by installing new, state-of-the-art drafting and weighing apparatus. However, with the onset of so many issues, I have been held up in the Gold Coast office…albeit a packed up office…trying to procure more breeding stock to ensure the growing demands on my supply, as well as lambs for the coming week.

Due to the re-emergence of drought, good lamb supply is getting very tight for the quality we deal in. So still here at 10pm, with the seven-hour drive home ahead of me, I am a little stressed…but as always some strange act of the universe will occur and as always I will have the best possible lamb available for our now seven Farmers Markets this weekend and our loyal online customers, as well as the restaurants we supply, whose orders just keep getting bigger. With me going away, I am trying to ensure our supplies match our growth in demand for the next months.

Amongst trying to pack up, ensure supply, redesign the farm to cope with another dry winter, and catch up with friends and family, I have found that I have been unable to keep my promises of catching up with everyone…so I hope over time I can make it up to those whom I have let down.

But for me there is no reason to whinge or complain, just get in a drive and hopefully on the way that breakthrough will occur on the matter of stock supply.

By the way, I won’t be writing for a while now, as I will be out on the farm, busy as a blue-arsed fly tomorrow, and then drive south on a mission to grow what we have started… firstly to Newcastle, then to Sydney, then to Orange, then to Cowra, and finally Melbourne by Monday…where we start the new chapter of Farmer Dave in the Big Smoke!

We have all been made aware of the Federal Government’s changes to the national budget, health care changes, which will make up to 500,000 young people ditch private health insurance, and almost $1 billion ripped out of regional Australia. Yes, that’s right, the great leap forward that sustainable agriculture made under the previous government has been coathangered, which means no more environment grants like the one my subcatchment group received. So much for a ‘green’ PM. The changes are great and expected, but one that has totally left me reeling is the Government’s 70% increase in taxes on premixed drinks.

This tax will do nothing to stop binge drinking. Education will, but it will add hundreds of millions to the Rudd Government’s surplus. But think about this…and this next point is what has got me so so worried…. if drinking is more expensive for students and the more financially stressed people in our community, what will they do for the escape they are currently getting from alcohol?

Welcome Australia to a massive increase in the use of illicit drugs and incresed consuption of spirits.

You don’t have to be Einstein to realise that if you don’t have the money to drink…which can be around $40 if you’re staying at home or $60 if you’re going out…and your mate says “here, I have an ‘E’, it’s only $25 and there is no hangover”…what do you think the answer is going to be?

Raising a person’s escapism costs by raising the costs of pre-mixed drinks, which are the ones you drink at home parties, prior to going out, and out in clubs, just increases the attraction to drugs.

Everytime I go out, people are increasing using GHB. It truly is shocking to see at every party I go to, at least a couple of people taken away in stretchers. GHB is a liquid drug (made infamous recently by a TV dancing judge who seemed not to like my dancing), which is taken and induces complete euphoria in the user.

However, take too much and you are in a stretcher. It also must be taken without alcohol. Actually scary to think now, isn’t it, that if alcohol is too expensive, GHB will be the drug of choice for our youth.

What does that mean to the rest of us who don’t take drugs?

Well, try getting an ambulance on a weekend. You won’t, because they will be attending not just nightclubs and raves but house parties where young people, unaware of how to use the drugs, will be OD-ing in droves…

They will be in taxi ranks still off their faces and either become perpetrators, or more likely victims, of crime.

They will be in parks like Todd, out of it, meaning the Gen Y issues you have with your staff will be tenfold, as they are trying to get their act together for Monday’s work day.

If it’s not GHB or E that they will be getting into, as maybe they are not up for a party night, then it will be cannabis…already being used in small country communities to absolute excess…and we all know too well the lasting effects of pot on the psychotic behaviour of longtime users.

Perhaps people wont turn to drugs, but if they still want to drink, like me thye will be buying a lot more liqour than nessessary, as it is more economical to purchase spirits and mix yourself…and we all know that there is no quantity control by the 4 th drink….

You see the government can raise the taxes and hence the prices of legal escapism, but people still need to escape from their daily lives…and they will.

If only petrol was cheaper…maybe many people would go driving to the country for an escape

This will be the most lasting effect of this government. Turning its youth into drug users and bigger drinkers.

My opposition to a unified non-Labor party has been due to my experiences in other western democracies, whereby the views of the rural minority are totally ignored due to their inability to shift enough seats to matter.

I have held the view that Australia, as a highly urbanised society, has been well supported by the political field of two major parties and a rural based party, which has been able to punch well above its actual ’seats in parliament’ clout, allowing the voices of the cultural heartland, who produce the vast majority of this nation’s food as well as a sizeable amount of the world’s, to be heard and acted upon in the best interest of the entire nation.

However, times have changed. Australia, like Europe and the US, is a nation with a parliament bullied by lobbiests, due mainly to the proliferation of media-driven public sentiment. Rural Australia has been highly active in keeping up with the shift in the power play, with the unification of rural lobby groups and the direct use of media, to ensure rural Australia’s message is heard by the urbanised voter.

Which is why I am now totally in favour of the Queensland conservatives dissolving and forming a new party.

The State no longer needs a rural focused party in parliament. Firstly, voters themselves have become split, with a variation of political support  in the form of independents, One Nation, Liberals and Nationals. So there is not one clear bloc which is focused on the interests of regional people. Even urban voters are left off the agenda as change is not forthcoming, they do not have an alternative, and in many instances choose independents over Liberal candidates due to the perception that Liberals are more interested in infighting.

Rural Australia is best served now by media savvy lobby groups, which are directly controlled by rural Australia with clear goals and objectives. The lobby group AgForce has proven that it can, with well planned campaigns, shift government policy, which has resulted in much better outcomes for regional people and industry.

However, relying on a party to achieve these objectives results in poor outcomes when that party is not in government, and in Queensland this is even more exaggerated with the lack of a ‘house of review’ in our unicarmal system. With the amalgamation of shires into super shires, the strength and mandate of local mayors has been dramatically improved, lending more weight to regional voices in their own areas, and again lessens the paramount need for a political party focused on regional issues, as the new shire mayors are, in fact, more able to voice and action the needs of their constituents at a State level.

A two-party system lends Queensland to better government. Why? Because the rag tag of non-Labor party groups ensures massive domination by Labor and ineffectual opposition. With a strong unified non-Labor party, Queenslanders would feel like they have an alternative worth voting for, which in turn results in the Government being more accountable by being on more of a close margin.

It’s exciting times in Queensland…finally we might have a more functioning democracy.

We may not be on our way to ditching Captain Bligh, but we are on our way to having her be a little more accountable and a little less sure of retiring whilst in office and handing her cap to Andrew Fraser, who will just continue racking up debt but ignoring the regions and not fixing health and policing. Acountability is the most important element we have in our democracy, for regardless of who is in government, be it a massive majority by Howard, Bjelke Petersen, Beattie or Rudd, an effective and strong opposition will keep them in check and in service to the people.

Today, like any other day, started with plans ahoy…then I got out of bed.

Being on the farm doesn’t mean I am not still attending to all the needs of my other interests… So after getting through as much as I could, I headed out around the farm to empty and clean all the water troughs and check the ewes that started lambing a few days ago. There were little pure white Dorper lambs everywhere as I wondered through the mobs to ensure there were no problems. It was as though the ground was moving….with the babies coming out of the tall grass to investigate what their mothers were stirring from.

I had my offsider ‘Jed’ with me to train him to heel through an open paddock of sheep. Though he did well, he showed severe anxiety whenever I was more then 5 metres away, which is going to be something I’ll have to work on over the coming week. The idea is to use him in the future to round up any single ewes that may have any health problems and treat them in the field so as not to disturb the whole mob and have any threat of mismothering, which is what happens when the whole mob is moved at this critical time.

Unfortunately, crow attacks had left several ewes blinded and a lamb orphaned, so I took him in for a feed only to find all the milk on my place gone and the only thing similar was some Milo… Unable to let the little bugger wait, I drove 30kms to Mum and Dad’s to find they were also out of milk, thanks to a run of orphaned poddy calves.

With Shirley another 20kms away and the little lamb making overtures, I rifled through the pantry and all I could find was Horlicks and Malted Milk.. so mixing them together and adding some warm water I had a little content cutie.

What ensued was one thing after the other, with not much action but a lot of running around… Just means tomorrow starts earlier and a lot less tail chasing will be going on.

But hey, at least one little fella will have a good night’s sleep

It’s a funny thing living without television and radio, especially when you are living alone and even more so when your cottage is hours from the action.

I logged on this morning to write a post on how things are going here on the farm only to discover that nature has decided to rearrange itself in the form of a massive cyclone in Burma, a monstrous earthquake in China and a billowing volcano in Chile.

My heart goes out to those people affected, especially those thousands in Burma and China who had little warning, if any, of the incredible phenomenon that hit them.

It puts it all into perspective for the rest of us going about our lives, be it facing a traffic fine, another month of drought, an annoying driver who consistently brakes and speeds up in front of you, or being chastised by a 7pm caller from a Delhi call centre.

One of the best things about being out here is that things always get knocked back into perspective….what with the dynamic world we live in.

The old prayer my mum has around the house about ‘knowing the difference between what you can change and what you can’t, and the wisdom to know the difference’.

Well I know I can’t change the rainfall, but I can do everything to ensure every drop that falls is put to best use…rebuilding sheep yards, fencing smaller paddocks, piping water further, re-digging the dam catchments and ensuring the stock are in the best of health.

So for me it’s no more complaints and a lot more action…. hell, at least I have the luxury to make that decision, unlike the poor buggers stuck under rubble.